Sunday, November 04, 2007

Terroryst Plotte Foyled

Nov 5th, 1605.

A terrorist plot to blow up the House of Lords was discovered today minutes before it could be executed and the entire country thrown into chaos. The plotters, mad Catholic fundamentalists, were planning to mount a coup in its wake, reverting this country to a mediaeval theocracy. They had assembled the largest ever cache of the advanced explosive, gunpowder.

The serjeant-at-arms, Sir William Bastarde, said today the terrorists were caught at the very last moment and marks a major achievement for the security forces, who were doing a good job under very difficult circumstances. The insurgents were being held in the maximum security prison at the Tower of London. He denied they were being tortured and were merely undergoing standard 'robust' interrogation techniques such as the rack, hot irons and being broken on the wheel.

Sir William said the terrorists, led by Robert Catesby and Guy 'Guido' Fawkes, would be tried and then executed. The government would press for the maximum penalty, hanging, drawing and quartering, and he deplored 'namby pamby liberals' who would like them to get off with a beheading.

Make no mistake, this plot has been hatched in Rome by the Catholofascist Vatican. A spokesman for the Pope today said that the Pope deplored terrorism and condemned wholeheartedly anyone involved in such bombings.


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